Hello Its me 008 the blogger formerly known as 007

*LOOKING AROUND AT /FOR THE VAST AUDIENCE*
Welcome to 008
To start off this new year of more interweb finds
that I believe are in formative controversies
 OMG maybe Even educational
 let me start with something we all can agree on

That would be "I don't understand you"
or there are differences between the way boys and girls think
*WAITING FOR APPLAUSE AND STANDING ALVATION...HEARING /SEEING NONE*

Lets begin
A married couple was in a car when the wife turned to her husband and asked,
"Would you like to stop for a coffee?"

"No, thanks," he answered truthfully. So they didn't stop.

The result?
 The wife, who had indeed wanted to stop,
became annoyed because she felt her preference had not been considered.

The husband, seeing his wife was angry, became frustrated.
Why didn't she just say what she wanted?

Unfortunately, he failed to see that his wife was asking the question
not to get an instant decision, but to begin a negotiation.
And the woman didn't realize that when her husband said no,
he was just expressing his preference, not making a ruling.

 When a man and woman interpret the same interchange in such conflicting ways,
 it's no wonder they can find themselves leveling angry charges of
selfishness and obstinacy at each other.



Status vs. Support.

Men grow up in a world in which a conversation is often a contest,
 either to achieve the upper hand or to prevent other people
 from pushing them around.

For women, however, talking is often a way to
exchange confirmation and support.



Independence vs. Intimacy.

Since women often think in terms of closeness and support,
they struggle to preserve intimacy.
 Men, concerned with status, tend to focus more on independence.
These traits can lead women and men to starkly different views
 of the same situation.



Advice vs. Understanding.

To many men a complaint is a challenge to come up with a solution.
 But often women are looking for emotional support, not solutions.



Information vs. Feelings.

Many women are hurt when men don't talk to them at home,
and many men are frustrated when they disappoint their partners
without knowing why.

men hold center stage in a social setting, telling jokes and stories.
They use conversation to claim attention and to entertain.
 Women can wind up hurt that their husbands tell
relative strangers things they have not told them.


Orders vs. Proposals.

Most men, resist being told what to do.
 She is making suggestions, not demands.
 Most women, formulate requests as proposals rather than orders.
 Her style of talking is a way of getting others to do what she wants
- but by winning agreement first.

With certain men, this tactic backfires.
If they perceive someone is trying to get them to do something indirectly,
they feel manipulated and respond more resentfully than they would
to a straightforward request.


Conflict vs. Compromise.

In trying to prevent fights, some women refuse to oppose the will of others openly.
 But sometimes it's far more effective for a woman to assert herself,
even at the risk of conflict.

When we don't see style differences for what they are,
we sometimes draw unfair conclusions:
 "You're illogical," "You're self- centered," "You don't care about me."
But once we grasp the two characteristic approaches,
 we stand a better chance of preventing disagreements
from spiraling out of control.

Learning the other's ways of talking is a leap across
the communication gap between men and women,
 and a giant step towards genuine understanding.


[LINK to a really long readers digested article that has been re digested here to the main points]
http://www.h2limousine.com/women-vs-men.php

So that's how I'm starting off this new year
  Now I know this will get me in a lot of trouble butt .....
What do you think? or is  "You Just Don't Understand"